Woolworths Now Taking The Piss By Releasing Commemorative Turkish Delight Tins For Anzac Day    

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Published by Anonymous (not verified) on Thu, 18/04/2024 - 6:28am in

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Business, Australia

Woolworths CEO Brad Banducci has admitted that the supermarket chain is now just plain fucking with the Australian public as he unveiled the store’s new range of commemorative turkish delight tins in time for Anzac Day.

“Stuff everyone, I’ve only got five more months left in the job so I’m going out with a bang,” said the embattled chief executive. “The next person can deal with this mess. I’m calling it clean up in aisle “I quit”,”

One Nation leader Pauline Hanson was unavailable for comment as her head exploded like a shell landing at Lone Pine after she saw the tins whilst shopping in her local Woollies.

“Pauline hasn’t seen nothing yet, wait till she claps her beady eyes on the range of sushi rolls we have planned for the anniversary of the bombing of Darwin and the trick water squirting poppies we intend to sell on Remembrance Day,” chortled Banducci on his way out of the senate inquiry. “I don’t know why Pauline has it in for us. We both have the same business model; screwing as much money we can out of hapless Queensland farmers.”

Peter Green

@greeny_peter

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