Local man-child and social group deadweight, Trevor Millson (33), has again attended a Christmas social bbq with his friends brandishing nothing but a $10 box of Cadbury favourites.

Wearing a t-shirt and jeans combo recycled from his laundry hamper, Trev arrive 90 minutes late to the BBQ at Bicentennial Park, with even the group’s younger generation giving him a sideways glance as he sauntered over.

“I made a God damn quinoa and chicken salad for today, making sure I had all the dietary requirements covered,” steamed an upset Angie, school friend and historic babysitter to Trevor, “Michael brought half a bloody butchers shop, even Andrew picked up some non alcoholic beers for the designated drivers.”

Unaware or ambivalent to the ire of his friends, Trevor dumped the Favourites on the main table before scoffing down 2 chops, 3 sangas, and a six pack of craft beer.

“Ahh, Trev’s ok,” Michael told UnOz reporters, “it’s just sometimes I think my 6yr old has her shit together more than he does.

After lunch Trevor started complaining about having to buy a Kris Kringle present for a family event, before spending the rest of the afternoon swiping right on Tinder.

GK Kidd

@GKTweetsHard

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