I had no idea the situation was so bad, but your shocking photo of an armed gang wearing "colours" breaking into a property has convinced me. Just as well that their pool tables and cash registers were seized. If you're hit over the head with either, it can leave a nasty bruise.

A week or two ago I was in a queue behind a gangly and awkward young lad wearing a thin first attempt at facial hair, baggy shorts, sneakers and a motorcycle gang "hoodie" featuring prominent swastikas. By a supreme effort of will, I resisted the urge to ask him if bikie gangs now accept members who only own a skateboard. My wife is looking into life insurance policies.